Anyone who knows me personally knows that Usher is my favorite artist of all time. Today I listened to a song by him called “lessons for the lover”. In the song explains the ups and downs a couple faces during their relationship. He goes on to say “no don’t leave, don’t go so easy. Let that argument turn you on”. But really how do we handle being at odds with the one we love?
I can’t help but glance at my own life and apply it.
It’s easier to leave and run away from finding and fixing the root of the issue. It’s easier to blame the other person and claim to be the victim and walk away in your own right. I can be honest and say that I’ve been in this space more times than I’m ok with admitting, but my love and commitment to my person and what we have is worth the push.
We can’t allow what we feel in the moment to dictate our actions, good or bad. Being at odds with your partner can make you feel many different types of ways. Anger, sadness, hopelessness to name a few. But the important thing to do is to sit with your self and figure out the root cause of why you feel that way. You never want to act from a place of hurt, we all know the saying; hurt people hurt people.
Although most people innocently just want to do whatever for the hurt to stop or end, most of us take the route of instant gratification. Example: “my partner is upset with me and treating me differently so I’ll go get what I’m not getting here, from somewhere else. “ instant gratification is the biggest murderer of all things good. It messes up families, businesses, finances, and much more. Not being able to be patient enough to wait to talk through things, or to just allow nature to run its course is a horrible way to live. You THINK you’re in control but ur living in “survival mode”, a slave to your own impulses.
If it’s one thing that love has taught me, it’s patience. The grass is the greenest where you water and tend to it. Wher you take care of it and put your all in. Where you balance the ego.
Where you allow yourself to always be a student and never an expert. Things take time to grow, things also take time to repair once damaged. Don’t grow weary, taking the chance of throwing away everything you’ve ever wanted because of the small bumps in the road. Do what you can to get back on mutual terms. Let both parties be heard. Set your ego aside and listen to the other person.
Is what you’re going thru worth separating and never seeing each other, or speaking again?
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